This is the time of year that everyone reflects on what has happened in the last twelve months. If you are interested in fashion, you check out the best and worst dressed lists. The political minded will think about Cain and Gingrich, Bin Laden and Kim Jong Il. The movie lovers may remember Moneyball and Twilight. Then, people like me, think about Mr. Andy Rooney.
I'm sure some television program will list all the famous people we lost this year, and when his name comes up a lot of people, especially the younger crowd, will say, "Who was that?" But for me, he was an old friend. I never met the man, but I knew him well. I got to know him over the years a few minutes at a time. I watched him on 60 Minutes when I was too young to understand or care about the news. But I could relate to the things he would talk about, even at that young age. I began reading his books when I was nine, and I have never stopped.
He was an influence on me. He was a writer, and sometimes as I read over my work, it is very obvious who inspired it. He influenced me as a person as well. He was such a regular guy. He may have been on TV, but he was not a celebrity. He had a normal life, with the same problems and idiosyncrasies that we regular people have. I shared his beliefs, most importantly his desire to just be a good person.
Thinking back on this year, there have been some very significant happenings. Some of them impacted the world. Some of them inspired gossip. But the thing that has impacted me the most was the loss of my good friend.
December 30, 2011
December 29, 2011
Ham-Broccoli Chowder
Who has leftover ham from the holidays? If your family likes this recipe as much as mine does, you won't have leftovers anymore; in fact, you will have to go out and get more ham!
2 tablespoons flour
1 small can evaporated milk
2 cups diced ham
1 package frozen broccoli
1/4 cup minced onion
1 cup grated Swiss cheese
2 cups water
1 cup light cream
Mix flour and evaporated milk in slow cooker. Add other ingredients except cream. Cook on low for 7 hours. Before serving, stir in cream and heat through.
2 tablespoons flour
1 small can evaporated milk
2 cups diced ham
1 package frozen broccoli
1/4 cup minced onion
1 cup grated Swiss cheese
2 cups water
1 cup light cream
Mix flour and evaporated milk in slow cooker. Add other ingredients except cream. Cook on low for 7 hours. Before serving, stir in cream and heat through.
December 26, 2011
Happy Homemaker Monday
The weather in my neck of the woods:
Clear, sunny, warm
Things that make me happy:
Playing with new Christmas toys
Book I'm reading:
Still recovering from Christmas. Maybe next week.
What's on my TV today:
No TV today.
On the menu for dinner:
Ham and Broccoli Chowder- I will post the recipe later this week. My boys LOVE it.
On my To Do List:
New Recipe I tried or want to try soon:
Anything to use up our leftover ham.
In the craft basket:
Christmas crafts are done! I'm on hiatus until January.
Looking forward to this week:
Spending time with both my kids at home.
Tips and Tricks:
Give everyone in the family new socks for Christmas. Then, before you put them away, gather up all the old socks and put them in your rag bag. Great for getting the kids to help with dusting; just put a sock on each hand and tell them to go touch stuff.
Looking forward to this week:
Spending time with both my kids at home.
Tips and Tricks:
Give everyone in the family new socks for Christmas. Then, before you put them away, gather up all the old socks and put them in your rag bag. Great for getting the kids to help with dusting; just put a sock on each hand and tell them to go touch stuff.
Blog Hopping (a new discovered blog you would like to share with the readers):
Malls of America. Its old, but its cool.
You can save a lot of money at Christmas by only giving your two year old one Speed McQueen toy. He probably won't play with the rest of the stuff anyway.
On my mind:
The 10,000 things that I always need to do in the last week of the year. Why does it seem so short?
December 23, 2011
Merry Christmas!
On my list of things to do today: go to the mall. There is an item there that I need to get for a Christmas present. I am not looking forward to this. What makes me upset is that my son attends school in the mall, so three days a week I sit in my "office" (outside Starbucks) and do my blogging and other computer work. Right after Thanksgiving a new kiosk went up five feet from where I sit. For weeks I looked at this item that would be perfect for my little one, but somehow I decided it would be a good idea to wait until the Friday before Christmas to make a special trip to the mall to purchase it.
This is what I mean by Just Getting By. Holly Homemaker would never let something like this happen. She would have sewed and glued and baked all of her gifts weeks ago, and would spend this Friday before Christmas frolicking in the snow with her children and making hot cocoa with whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon on top. I, on the other hand, will move the dirty laundry into the garage, throw the toys that are on the living room floor into a corner, and go battle the crowds at the mall in my sweatpants and flip flops. The closest I will get to my Holly Homemaker fantasy is that it was 33 degrees when I dropped my husband off at the bus this morning. For southern California that's practically a blizzard (even though the sun is shining and there isn't a cloud in the sky).
I'm not complaining though. I'm just wondering where all the people are who are like me. I can't be the only one that struggles to make life work. Back up. My life works all the time, it just doesn't usually go smoothly. So this Merry Christmas goes out to all of you who's houses are still messy, who didn't buy enough gifts, who's Christmas trees are lopsided (or dead), who didn't have time to send Christmas cards, who will be having pizza for Christmas dinner, who decided to fix the car instead of splurge on presents, and who's kids will try out their new skateboards over dead leaves on Christmas morning instead of new sleds on freshly fallen snow. Have a good one!
This is what I mean by Just Getting By. Holly Homemaker would never let something like this happen. She would have sewed and glued and baked all of her gifts weeks ago, and would spend this Friday before Christmas frolicking in the snow with her children and making hot cocoa with whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon on top. I, on the other hand, will move the dirty laundry into the garage, throw the toys that are on the living room floor into a corner, and go battle the crowds at the mall in my sweatpants and flip flops. The closest I will get to my Holly Homemaker fantasy is that it was 33 degrees when I dropped my husband off at the bus this morning. For southern California that's practically a blizzard (even though the sun is shining and there isn't a cloud in the sky).
I'm not complaining though. I'm just wondering where all the people are who are like me. I can't be the only one that struggles to make life work. Back up. My life works all the time, it just doesn't usually go smoothly. So this Merry Christmas goes out to all of you who's houses are still messy, who didn't buy enough gifts, who's Christmas trees are lopsided (or dead), who didn't have time to send Christmas cards, who will be having pizza for Christmas dinner, who decided to fix the car instead of splurge on presents, and who's kids will try out their new skateboards over dead leaves on Christmas morning instead of new sleds on freshly fallen snow. Have a good one!
December 21, 2011
I took my baby (not a baby) to the hospital early this morning for an MRI. The MRI part isn't bad, but because he is only 2 1/2, he can't be still for the hour that the procedure takes. So he was put under general anesthesia. If you have never experienced that with a child, hopefully you will never have to. Its not fun to see your baby stare at you but not see you.
But that is all over, and now I have a regular toddler that will not take a nap. We were up at 4:30 to get to the hospital, and he was only asleep for the procedure for a little over an hour. By my calculations, he should be napping peacefully now. Instead, my mother played with him while I took a nap. And since I've been awake, he has torn up Grammy's house and tormented his brother with gusto. I guess kids are tougher than their parents sometimes.
But that is all over, and now I have a regular toddler that will not take a nap. We were up at 4:30 to get to the hospital, and he was only asleep for the procedure for a little over an hour. By my calculations, he should be napping peacefully now. Instead, my mother played with him while I took a nap. And since I've been awake, he has torn up Grammy's house and tormented his brother with gusto. I guess kids are tougher than their parents sometimes.
December 19, 2011
Happy Homemaker Monday
The weather in my neck of the woods:
Chilly, with a few clouds.
Things that make me happy:
Book I'm reading:
Then Again, Maybe I Won't. Young teen book I got for my son for Christmas.
What's on my TV today:
On my To Do List:
Wrap presents
New Recipe I tried or want to try soon:
Sticking to things I already know for this busy time.
New Recipe I tried or want to try soon:
Sticking to things I already know for this busy time.
In the craft basket:
Looking forward to this week:
Just cruising through the week (and buying more presents)
Tips and Tricks:
Bribe your toddlers with bananas: "You want a banana? OK, put your shoes and jacket on and I'll give you a banana."
My favorite blog post this week:
Probably this one because its the only blog related thing I've had time to do this week.
Blog Hopping (a new discovered blog you would like to share with the readers):
See above.
Lesson learned the past few days:
When you go to the zoo, don't assume your husband grabbed the diapers. Husbands, don't assume your wife grabbed the diapers.
On my mind:
My 2 1/2 year old is having an MRI this week and will need general anesthesia. I hate that.
When you go to the zoo, don't assume your husband grabbed the diapers. Husbands, don't assume your wife grabbed the diapers.
On my mind:
My 2 1/2 year old is having an MRI this week and will need general anesthesia. I hate that.
December 16, 2011
Scary Public Schools
When we first moved into our house, I was excited about finally being able to settle into a place instead of moving every couple of years. My son Anthony attended the same elementary school regardless of where we lived because I wanted him to have continuity, and I made the extra effort to commute him there. I was looking forward to being here permanently and having a school close by that he could walk or ride his bike to.
That wish was promptly dashed the first morning we left the house. We live next door to the high school and the kids were on their way to school. I had never been so frightened/appalled by young people before. These people were angry, slovenly, foul mouthed, and all around nasty. I surprised myself at how strongly I reacted to them. I was 'different' in high school and I believe that kids need to be allowed to express themselves and be individuals. I guess the difference between me and them is that I still had respect for other people while expressing myself.
I'm sure there are plenty of good kids at that school but I also know that there are some rotten ones. So I decided to put my Anthony into a charter school. It is an independent study program where he studies one subject at a time, at his own pace. He meets with his teacher three times a week, and the rest of the time he is home working with me. I had concerns that he would not get to socialize with people his own age. Then I thought back to when I was in middle school, and the type of socialization I got. I had friends, but I also had to worry about my hair (which was never right), my clothes (which were ugly because at a whopping 100 pounds I was too fat to get the cool clothes), and mean girls that I didn't even know that would beat up my friends because they made eye contact.
I decided that it was okay for Anthony to miss out on that stuff. I would just have to make an effort to get him involved with other kids that were doing something positive. He is an active boy scout in a troop of really nice, respectful kids. I would like to get him involved in sports soon as well. I don't know if I will keep him in this school until he graduates, but I do think he can be a better high school student if he can avoid the virtual torture of middle school. Hopefully he can concentrate on his studies and build some confidence. He can socialize with good kids. And if he does go to the regular high school, he will be confident enough to make the right decisions, even if they aren't cool.
That wish was promptly dashed the first morning we left the house. We live next door to the high school and the kids were on their way to school. I had never been so frightened/appalled by young people before. These people were angry, slovenly, foul mouthed, and all around nasty. I surprised myself at how strongly I reacted to them. I was 'different' in high school and I believe that kids need to be allowed to express themselves and be individuals. I guess the difference between me and them is that I still had respect for other people while expressing myself.
I'm sure there are plenty of good kids at that school but I also know that there are some rotten ones. So I decided to put my Anthony into a charter school. It is an independent study program where he studies one subject at a time, at his own pace. He meets with his teacher three times a week, and the rest of the time he is home working with me. I had concerns that he would not get to socialize with people his own age. Then I thought back to when I was in middle school, and the type of socialization I got. I had friends, but I also had to worry about my hair (which was never right), my clothes (which were ugly because at a whopping 100 pounds I was too fat to get the cool clothes), and mean girls that I didn't even know that would beat up my friends because they made eye contact.
I decided that it was okay for Anthony to miss out on that stuff. I would just have to make an effort to get him involved with other kids that were doing something positive. He is an active boy scout in a troop of really nice, respectful kids. I would like to get him involved in sports soon as well. I don't know if I will keep him in this school until he graduates, but I do think he can be a better high school student if he can avoid the virtual torture of middle school. Hopefully he can concentrate on his studies and build some confidence. He can socialize with good kids. And if he does go to the regular high school, he will be confident enough to make the right decisions, even if they aren't cool.
December 14, 2011
Breaking And Entering Christmas
In Monday's post I included a link to a local radio station. The Jeff and Jer Showgram has been on the air in San Diego for over 20 years, and after that long, they all feel like family to me. Jerry shares my love of the arts, and Jeff has stupid stuff happen to him just like me. Then there's Little Tommy. Tommy and I are from the same part of town, the largest suburb of San Diego, Chula Vista. Somehow, even though it is the largest suburb, is seems like most of Greater San Diego has no idea that Chula Vista exists. Because of that, the people share a great pride in their town, and we all stick together.
That's why every year in December I can't wait to hear Tommy's Breaking and Entering Christmas. The idea is simple: Tommy and some of his childhood friends from the neighborhood find a family that is probably not going to have a very nice Christmas. They find some way to get the family out of the house, then they break in, leave a tree, and toys and presents, and then they leave. When the family comes home they don't know what hit them.
Every year when Breaking and Entering Christmas airs, I'm usually in the car dropping off the kids or the husband. As soon as they are all dropped off, I tune in and start my drive home. Then I start to cry. I drive and I cry, and sometimes I pull into a parking lot because I can't see through the tears anymore. Tommy starts by reading a letter. Tommy picks the family to help based on letters sent suggesting a family in need. One consistent theme in the letters is that all of these families are good, hard working people that have fallen on tough times. They do everything they can to keep their families together and healthy, but sometimes have to sacrifice the 'extras' like toys, or heat.
After the letter, the fun begins. They pick the lock and then they start bringing in Christmas. The tree, the lights, the decorations, and the presents. One year I remember they hid 100 dollar bills throughout the house. Imagine the surprise of coming home to this bounty, then sometime in January when Christmas is long gone, opening up the linen closet so you can put fresh sheets on the bed, and finding a hundred dollars!
Tommy does this with just a bunch of regular guys from regular old Chula Vista. Of course being on the radio has its benefits and the event has grown. People from all over the county volunteer their time or donate something. But the idea is always the same. Its not about sponsorship and what company donated the tree or the new bikes; its about helping out a family that needs it without the expectation of being thanked. As soon as they're done, they get out. We never hear what happens when the family gets home.
This year's Breaking and Entering Christmas was so good that I'm still thinking about it two days later, and blogging about it. You can see pictures of it here. When I looked at the 'before' pictures, my life suddenly felt a lot nicer, and I realized I have nothing to complain about. When times are tough, take a step back and think about the things that really matter.
Thanks Tommy, Jeff, Jerry, and everyone on the Showgram. You guys really are a part of my family.
That's why every year in December I can't wait to hear Tommy's Breaking and Entering Christmas. The idea is simple: Tommy and some of his childhood friends from the neighborhood find a family that is probably not going to have a very nice Christmas. They find some way to get the family out of the house, then they break in, leave a tree, and toys and presents, and then they leave. When the family comes home they don't know what hit them.
Every year when Breaking and Entering Christmas airs, I'm usually in the car dropping off the kids or the husband. As soon as they are all dropped off, I tune in and start my drive home. Then I start to cry. I drive and I cry, and sometimes I pull into a parking lot because I can't see through the tears anymore. Tommy starts by reading a letter. Tommy picks the family to help based on letters sent suggesting a family in need. One consistent theme in the letters is that all of these families are good, hard working people that have fallen on tough times. They do everything they can to keep their families together and healthy, but sometimes have to sacrifice the 'extras' like toys, or heat.
After the letter, the fun begins. They pick the lock and then they start bringing in Christmas. The tree, the lights, the decorations, and the presents. One year I remember they hid 100 dollar bills throughout the house. Imagine the surprise of coming home to this bounty, then sometime in January when Christmas is long gone, opening up the linen closet so you can put fresh sheets on the bed, and finding a hundred dollars!
Tommy does this with just a bunch of regular guys from regular old Chula Vista. Of course being on the radio has its benefits and the event has grown. People from all over the county volunteer their time or donate something. But the idea is always the same. Its not about sponsorship and what company donated the tree or the new bikes; its about helping out a family that needs it without the expectation of being thanked. As soon as they're done, they get out. We never hear what happens when the family gets home.
This year's Breaking and Entering Christmas was so good that I'm still thinking about it two days later, and blogging about it. You can see pictures of it here. When I looked at the 'before' pictures, my life suddenly felt a lot nicer, and I realized I have nothing to complain about. When times are tough, take a step back and think about the things that really matter.
Thanks Tommy, Jeff, Jerry, and everyone on the Showgram. You guys really are a part of my family.
December 12, 2011
Happy Homemaker Monday
The weather in my neck of the woods:
It's sprinkling!!! I am soooo excited!
Things that make me happy:
Book I'm reading:
Who has time for books in December?
What's on my TV today:
On the menu for dinner:
Soup since it's raining. Don't know what kind yet.
Soup since it's raining. Don't know what kind yet.
On my To Do List:
Final cleaning before we get our tree tomorrow.
New Recipe I tried or want to try soon:
Any ideas?
In the craft basket:
Looking forward to this week:
Putting up our tree and sending Christmas cards.
Tips and Tricks:
None this week, but I could really use some!
My favorite blog post this week:
Overload from Mod Mom Furniture
Blog Hopping (a new discovered blog you would like to share with the readers):
Mod Mom Furniture
Lesson learned the past few days:
My house might be a mess, but at least I have a house to be messy in.
On my mind:
Little Tommy's Breaking and Entering Christmas
My house might be a mess, but at least I have a house to be messy in.
On my mind:
Little Tommy's Breaking and Entering Christmas
December 9, 2011
Jury Duty
I missed Wednesday's blog post because I was at jury duty. Though I wish I had been able to post, I am glad that it was for a good cause.
My first impression of jury duty came from adults complaining that they had been called, and what a nuisance it was. I never heard anyone say anything positive about it, and I learned that when you get called, the first thing you should do is try to get out of it. So, that is what I have done for the last sixteen years. The first time I was called, I was attending college out of state. My mother called me and said I got a letter in the mail and that she would tell them I wasn't in the state, end of story.
The next few times I was called, I was a single mother working at a piddly job. But as piddly as my job was, it was my only job, and the only way I had of supporting myself and my son. That was an easy excuse. Then I moved up in the world. I got a great job making great money. I had wonderful benefits: paid vacation, retirement plan, medical insurance, free dental work, child care supplement... but no days off for jury duty. The next two times I used a new and interesting excuse. Did you know breastfeeding mothers can be excused from jury duty? I proudly checked the box and thanked my baby boy.
This year when I got the call there were no excuses. I am unemployed so no need to request time off. I reside in the county where I was called. The thought of breastfeeding my 2 1/2 year old (who has gotten in trouble at preschool for biting) is frightening. So, off to jury duty I went.
What I found out was that it is not something that needs to be avoided at all costs. There are people that have a legitimate excuse, but there shouldn't be a scramble every year to make up a sob story so you can get out of it. I found the process to be very interesting for most of the day. There were some long waiting periods, but I brought a book so the time passed pleasantly. One thing that I did not expect was to get a renewed faith in our judicial system. I am not a blind promoter of the United States. I see MANY things that need to be fixed. But as far as the fairness of a criminal trial goes, I think we're right on. Whether or not you agree with the outcome of a trial, be assured that our government takes every opportunity to make the trial process as fair as possible.
It is surprising to me to hear myself make a statement like that. I am typically very critical of the government. But I am also big on having an open mind, so that's the way I reported to jury duty. With a closed mind I would have been irritated for being inconvenienced. With an open mind I got a first hand look at why we live in a wonderful country.
My first impression of jury duty came from adults complaining that they had been called, and what a nuisance it was. I never heard anyone say anything positive about it, and I learned that when you get called, the first thing you should do is try to get out of it. So, that is what I have done for the last sixteen years. The first time I was called, I was attending college out of state. My mother called me and said I got a letter in the mail and that she would tell them I wasn't in the state, end of story.
The next few times I was called, I was a single mother working at a piddly job. But as piddly as my job was, it was my only job, and the only way I had of supporting myself and my son. That was an easy excuse. Then I moved up in the world. I got a great job making great money. I had wonderful benefits: paid vacation, retirement plan, medical insurance, free dental work, child care supplement... but no days off for jury duty. The next two times I used a new and interesting excuse. Did you know breastfeeding mothers can be excused from jury duty? I proudly checked the box and thanked my baby boy.
This year when I got the call there were no excuses. I am unemployed so no need to request time off. I reside in the county where I was called. The thought of breastfeeding my 2 1/2 year old (who has gotten in trouble at preschool for biting) is frightening. So, off to jury duty I went.
What I found out was that it is not something that needs to be avoided at all costs. There are people that have a legitimate excuse, but there shouldn't be a scramble every year to make up a sob story so you can get out of it. I found the process to be very interesting for most of the day. There were some long waiting periods, but I brought a book so the time passed pleasantly. One thing that I did not expect was to get a renewed faith in our judicial system. I am not a blind promoter of the United States. I see MANY things that need to be fixed. But as far as the fairness of a criminal trial goes, I think we're right on. Whether or not you agree with the outcome of a trial, be assured that our government takes every opportunity to make the trial process as fair as possible.
It is surprising to me to hear myself make a statement like that. I am typically very critical of the government. But I am also big on having an open mind, so that's the way I reported to jury duty. With a closed mind I would have been irritated for being inconvenienced. With an open mind I got a first hand look at why we live in a wonderful country.
December 5, 2011
Happy Homemaker Monday
The weather in my neck of the woods:
Windy. All the brown leaves should be gone by the end of the day.
Things that make me happy:
Book I'm reading:
No Plot, No Problem (I claim to be writing a book. I need inspiration.)
What's on my TV today:
On the menu for dinner:
Tilapia and zucchini
Tilapia and zucchini
On my To Do List:
Declutter
Weekly Home Blessing Hour
In the craft basket:
Looking forward to this week:
Nothing unusual on the calendar. I like routine.
Tips and Tricks:
If you have an asian market near, you can get ramen noodles in plastic bowls. Once you eat the noodles, the bowls are great for cereal, toddler meals, leftovers. When they get beat up, just recycle them.
My favorite blog post this week:
I've been playing catch-up, so I haven't read any this week.
Blog Hopping (a new discovered blog you would like to share with the readers):
Maybe I'll find something in the coming week.
When you get called for jury duty, you should write the date down on your calendar so it doesn't slip your mind.
On my mind:
I need to get rid of a lot of stuff that is cluttering my house and my mind.
December 2, 2011
What Are You Juggling?
I have been a blogger for a month now. I just looked over the titles of all of my previous posts and it made my brain hurt. I had such a clear idea of what I wanted this blog to be about, and through none of my own doing, I nailed it. Hey, if you aim low enough, you almost never fail! I have posted an incoherent array of subjects, but that's what Just Getting By is all about - at least I posted something.
I used to read other blogs about homemaking and I would feel bad because their lives seemed so perfect. "Today, after I sew little Nancy a new dress, I will go pick some fresh tea leaves from my garden and infuse them with the essence of the peaches from the orchard." Yeah right. I grow weeds in my garden, and the peaches I buy at the supermarket go bad in the back of the fridge. I'm confident I will never be Holly Homemaker, but I'm okay with being Andrea Who's House Is A Mess This Week But Who Finished Making Homemade Candy For Christmas Gifts.
That is the true meaning of Just Getting By. I don't feel bad that those perfect people out there know how to make fancy homemade candy (or scarves, or laundry soap, or greeting cards); I know how to do all that stuff too. I just can't seem to do all of it at once. When I accomplish something like getting the house decorated for a holiday, something else suffers - the car gets overloaded with Storm Troopers and Cheerios or that important piece of paper gets lost in The Pile. I am constantly juggling, and I'm not very good at it. But somehow we have a place to live and food to eat. And even though the shirt I'm wearing has been in my wardrobe since 1991, at least I'm not sitting here naked (and if I wait long enough, I will eventually be back in style.)
This has been a fun month, and I look forward to continuing here. Please look forward to more on organization, recipes, healthy eating, indulgent eating, moming, and whatever else gets thrown at me.
I used to read other blogs about homemaking and I would feel bad because their lives seemed so perfect. "Today, after I sew little Nancy a new dress, I will go pick some fresh tea leaves from my garden and infuse them with the essence of the peaches from the orchard." Yeah right. I grow weeds in my garden, and the peaches I buy at the supermarket go bad in the back of the fridge. I'm confident I will never be Holly Homemaker, but I'm okay with being Andrea Who's House Is A Mess This Week But Who Finished Making Homemade Candy For Christmas Gifts.
That is the true meaning of Just Getting By. I don't feel bad that those perfect people out there know how to make fancy homemade candy (or scarves, or laundry soap, or greeting cards); I know how to do all that stuff too. I just can't seem to do all of it at once. When I accomplish something like getting the house decorated for a holiday, something else suffers - the car gets overloaded with Storm Troopers and Cheerios or that important piece of paper gets lost in The Pile. I am constantly juggling, and I'm not very good at it. But somehow we have a place to live and food to eat. And even though the shirt I'm wearing has been in my wardrobe since 1991, at least I'm not sitting here naked (and if I wait long enough, I will eventually be back in style.)
This has been a fun month, and I look forward to continuing here. Please look forward to more on organization, recipes, healthy eating, indulgent eating, moming, and whatever else gets thrown at me.
November 30, 2011
Going Home
My father is moving home tomorrow morning. I am pondering what 'home' really means. In my father's case, it is where he was born, and where his mother lives. A brother and a son are there. If you call a whole state home, then his sister lives there too. Include neighboring states, and he gets a daughter and two grandkids.
The 'home' that he is leaving is very un-homey apartment that he has no attachment to that happens to be less than a mile from another daughter and two grandkids. While the apartment was only occupied by him for about a year, it is in a county he has resided in for more than half his life.
Without the old, "Home is where the heart is," what is it really? My father is not going to live in the same house he was born in, just the same town, so is a town your home? And if you have spent most of your life in a town you weren't born in, which one wins the title?
When I was away at college, I went home to my dorm room after class, but home to San Diego for Christmas. To get technical about it, my mother lived in a suburb of San Diego, but I never told my college friends I would be going home to sunny La Mesa for the holidays. And how could I be at home where my mother lives in California, when my mother's home is states away in Utah where her mother lived?
Half of the things from my fathers old home are now at my home - things he kept there for my kids who visited at least once a week since we lived down the street. His new home is 2000 miles away; he won't need those things anymore.
Is home the building? The stuff in it? Is it the town, or the state, or the people who live with you or nearby? If you were born in Seattle, were raised in Kansas, your parents live in Texas, and you live in Detroit with your spouse and kids, how do you get home?
The 'home' that he is leaving is very un-homey apartment that he has no attachment to that happens to be less than a mile from another daughter and two grandkids. While the apartment was only occupied by him for about a year, it is in a county he has resided in for more than half his life.
Without the old, "Home is where the heart is," what is it really? My father is not going to live in the same house he was born in, just the same town, so is a town your home? And if you have spent most of your life in a town you weren't born in, which one wins the title?
When I was away at college, I went home to my dorm room after class, but home to San Diego for Christmas. To get technical about it, my mother lived in a suburb of San Diego, but I never told my college friends I would be going home to sunny La Mesa for the holidays. And how could I be at home where my mother lives in California, when my mother's home is states away in Utah where her mother lived?
Half of the things from my fathers old home are now at my home - things he kept there for my kids who visited at least once a week since we lived down the street. His new home is 2000 miles away; he won't need those things anymore.
Is home the building? The stuff in it? Is it the town, or the state, or the people who live with you or nearby? If you were born in Seattle, were raised in Kansas, your parents live in Texas, and you live in Detroit with your spouse and kids, how do you get home?
November 28, 2011
Happy Homemaker Monday
The weather in my neck of the woods:
A little cloudy. Boring mild southern California weather. There are no seasons here.
Things that make me happy:
Book I'm reading:
The Gallery of Regrettable Food
What's on my TV today:
On the menu for dinner:
Slow Cooker Beef Stew
On my To Do List:
Slow Cooker Beef Stew
On my To Do List:
New Recipe I tried or want to try soon:
Slow Cooker Breakfast Casserole (notice the slow cooker trend?)
In the craft basket:
Looking forward to this week:
A quiet week before CHRISTMASTIME
Tips and Tricks:
Kid's de-tangling spray works for grownups too.
My favorite blog post this week:
The Bleat
Blog Hopping (a new discovered blog you would like to share with the readers):
The Deadmalls blog. I'm fascinated by this subject and I don't know why!
No words needed (favorite photo or picture, yours or others you want to share):
Lesson learned the past few days:
Not to just tell my husband, "Don't park there." I must tell him why. "Please do not park in that overgrown and muddy vacant lot because in the five minutes I am gone, I'm sure you will manage to do something wrong to the car."
On my mind:
Dad is moving across the country this week.
November 25, 2011
Backer Friday
So, I’m not thinking about Black Friday today. I am thinking about Backer Friday. When you give yourself a deadline, you surprisingly get a lot of stuff done. For years I’ve been writing. I can’t get rid of my old computer because it contains thousands of pages of my writing. “Someday” I will publish it. Well, “someday” finally came.
I started a project with Kickstarter.com, which is a fundraising website for artistic causes. You get a certain number of days (I chose 30) to get people to pledge money for your project. You also have to set a goal for how much money you need to raise. If your goal is reached by the deadline, you get the money. If you don’t reach the goal, any backers who pledged don’t get charged. And as a backer, you are entitled to rewards depending on how much you pledge. For example, if you pledge a dollar for my project, I will send a thank you tweet. Pledge $15 and you get an autographed copy of the book. Check it out here and see the special reward you get for a $36 pledge!
I started a project with Kickstarter.com, which is a fundraising website for artistic causes. You get a certain number of days (I chose 30) to get people to pledge money for your project. You also have to set a goal for how much money you need to raise. If your goal is reached by the deadline, you get the money. If you don’t reach the goal, any backers who pledged don’t get charged. And as a backer, you are entitled to rewards depending on how much you pledge. For example, if you pledge a dollar for my project, I will send a thank you tweet. Pledge $15 and you get an autographed copy of the book. Check it out here and see the special reward you get for a $36 pledge!
I would like to thank Roseann McPhaul for being my largest backer to date (she’s also my mom). She pledged $300. For that amount, she gets a thank you tweet, a copy of the book, and I will include her artwork in one of the short stories. I’m not sure she paid much attention to the rewards when she chose an amount to pledge because I’ve never known her to be much of an artist. But she draws good sheep, so I guess I will just have to write a story about sheep so that her artwork doesn’t seem out of place.
Today, think about pledging a dollar (or more) to an artistic cause. If reading my book isn’t your thing, there are plenty of other interesting projects on Kickstarter. Without your help, these creative people may not ever get a chance to share their art.
November 21, 2011
Let's Tighten Our Belts
We all know the holidays are approaching. I've been pummeled by advertisements for Black Friday deals. A flatscreet TV for only $499! Well, excuse me for being a killjoy, but who can honestly afford $499 for anything? If I had $499 I could think of 499 better things to do with it besides buy a television.
I am troubled lately by a feeling of extreme inadequacy. My husband works all day. I'm on unemployment and searching (and searching, and searching) for a job. In the mean time, I'm hustling. A few dollars here, a few dollars there, for random tasks for people. We are bringing in as much money as we possibly can, but its still not enough. So we need to cut back.
I need your help. I'm trying to keep a positive outlook, but I don't know where else to cut. We don't eat out. No Starbucks. I pay about $10 a month for phone service. All of my clothes are hand-me-downs from my mother. I don't wear make-up, and I cut my own hair. My mani-pedi consists of my husband clipping my nails before bed. My husband rides the bus to work. We drink tap water.
Please share some suggestions. I have stretched my dollars as far as I can. Anyone feel the same? What are you doing to get by?
I am troubled lately by a feeling of extreme inadequacy. My husband works all day. I'm on unemployment and searching (and searching, and searching) for a job. In the mean time, I'm hustling. A few dollars here, a few dollars there, for random tasks for people. We are bringing in as much money as we possibly can, but its still not enough. So we need to cut back.
I need your help. I'm trying to keep a positive outlook, but I don't know where else to cut. We don't eat out. No Starbucks. I pay about $10 a month for phone service. All of my clothes are hand-me-downs from my mother. I don't wear make-up, and I cut my own hair. My mani-pedi consists of my husband clipping my nails before bed. My husband rides the bus to work. We drink tap water.
Please share some suggestions. I have stretched my dollars as far as I can. Anyone feel the same? What are you doing to get by?
November 18, 2011
A New Project
If someone has a blog, its probably obvious that they enjoy writing. So it should come as no surprise that I am publishing a book. What is a surprise is that I am going to follow through with this.
I recently came to the realization that if you want to do something in life, you have to do it. Seems logical, right? Well, the only thing that keeps me from being embarrassed about not knowing this is that I strongly suspect that I'm not the only one who didn't know. A relatively small number of people in this country have clued in to it. Take your local nail salon for instance. I think that I could run a good nail salon (I wouldn't be doing the work, of course, I would just run things.) I would hire certain people, and decorate a certain way, and treat my customers a certain way. I would be successful. But guess what. I do not own a successful nail salon because I did not purchase a nail salon to run. The people who run them are the ones that did the work. They had the desire, they raised the money, they bought the equipment, they rented the space, and they assumed the risk. And a lot of nail salon owners did all that with a very weak command of the English language. What do they have that I don't? They got off their butts and did it, that's what.
So, I am officially off my butt. Over the years I have written thousands of pages material, from short stories, to diary entries, to scathing letters to the editor. Because I'm going to be a writer some day. Well its been years and I am not famous yet because all those pages are locked away on my flash drive, and nobody except me has ever read them. So now I am in the process of picking some material from my archives and writing some new stuff. I am going to publish a collection of short stories in paperback form; meant to be kept in your purse or back pocket to pass the time while waiting for something. I am not thinking about doing this. I am doing it. I am compiling the material. I am raising funds. I am researching publishing companies and the legal aspects of everything. I anticipate a finished product by February. It will be done.
All those people who succeed don't do it all by themselves though. Everyone needs a helping hand. Please visit my project page at http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/beefykeen/mediocrity to see how you can help. Every little bit is appreciated. I will not fail you. Look for my book in February (I really have to do it now or it will be really embarrassing to explain that all the hype was a well intentioned lie.)
November 15, 2011
Buenos Dias?
Well, I chickened out. In my last post I told you I was going to buy a new bathing suit for my trip to Mexico. I just got so busy procrastinating that I didn't have the time. And I had packed my old suit just in case. As it turns out, a new suit would not have helped me anyway.
Mexico was beautiful and relaxing. We stayed in a pretty posh resort with a FANTASTIC pool. On the first day we went for a dip in the morning, and somehow didn't manage to get out of the pool until it got dark. The swim up bar probably contributed to our lengthy stay. So with perfect weather, a beautiful pool, and attentive resort staff, what could I complain about?
Digital cameras, that's what (please stay with me while I rationalize). In the old days, you took your camera on vacation, and took pictures of beautiful and interesting things, or yourself next to those things. You hoped that the pictures came out. You enjoyed your trip, and then when you got home you sent the film in to be developed. Then you got to relive the excitement of your vacation when the pictures came back. Sometimes there would be a picture that was bad because the flash didn't go off, or you had your eyes closed and your mouth gaping open, but that was okay. You treasured the memory of your vacation.
Then along comes the digital camera. Now, as you're relaxing at the swim up bar in your five-year-old-pre-last-baby-who-is-now-two-so-there's-no-excuse-for-not-losing-the-baby-weight-yet bathing suit, your friends decide they want a group picture. You get the bartender to snap the photo while you all pose, and then he shows you the picture. Jennifer says she doesn't like it because she was squinting, so Mr. Bartender takes another. Now Cassie doesn't like it because she was hunched over funny. "Mr. Bartender!" In every photo that is taken, one person doesn't like the way she is posed, but in every single shot you are fat, and there's nothing you can do about it. And with every single shot you are reminded of it.
It is no surprise to me that I'm fat, but I hope I can at least forget about it for a while when I'm on vacation. With these darn digital cameras I see myself immediately and it detracts from my enjoyment of the moment. Maybe I shouldn't be drinking this sweet and delicious pina colada. Instead of steak and lobster tonight, I should just have some boiled carrots. Because I don't deserve to have any fun because I'm fat.
I know its not the camera's fault, but I must admit that I would have had more fun if I hadn't seen my sagging arm fat or my shapeless form. So what am I going to do about it? I don't have a brilliant answer, or an answer that will necessarily work for someone else in my situation. What I will do is start being nice to my body by not cluttering it up with crap. I will feed myself with food that nourishes my body. I will not deprive myself of an occasional treat, and I will understand that "occasional" does not mean every day or every meal. I will report my progress here, even if its bad. And when it is bad, I will not give up. I will admit that I made some bad choices, figure out a better way to handle the situation, and keep on truckin'.
Just Getting By is not about weight loss. It is about getting through life, and balancing all of its demands. One of my biggest and hardest demands to manage is my weight. I have often said that celebrities have it easy when it comes to weight loss. Not that they just magically lose the weight; they have to work just as hard as we do to get results. But in addition to losing weight, I have to get the kids to school, count change so I can buy milk, vacuum and do the laundry, and dig a trench in the backyard when it rains because the HOA doesn't think its important to maintain the drainage system. I may be wrong, but I don't think celebrities do most of those things.
So if you are a regular person, single, a mom, a single mom, a working mom or SAHM, hang in there with me. On the days I don't lose weight, its because I'm busy paying the mortgage. You know what things distract or prevent you from doing what is best for yourself. Please share your challenges with me, and I will do the same. Let's learn from and support each other. We may not ever be bikini ready, but we can try!
I'm gonna go buy some carrots.
Mexico was beautiful and relaxing. We stayed in a pretty posh resort with a FANTASTIC pool. On the first day we went for a dip in the morning, and somehow didn't manage to get out of the pool until it got dark. The swim up bar probably contributed to our lengthy stay. So with perfect weather, a beautiful pool, and attentive resort staff, what could I complain about?
Digital cameras, that's what (please stay with me while I rationalize). In the old days, you took your camera on vacation, and took pictures of beautiful and interesting things, or yourself next to those things. You hoped that the pictures came out. You enjoyed your trip, and then when you got home you sent the film in to be developed. Then you got to relive the excitement of your vacation when the pictures came back. Sometimes there would be a picture that was bad because the flash didn't go off, or you had your eyes closed and your mouth gaping open, but that was okay. You treasured the memory of your vacation.
Then along comes the digital camera. Now, as you're relaxing at the swim up bar in your five-year-old-pre-last-baby-who-is-now-two-so-there's-no-excuse-for-not-losing-the-baby-weight-yet bathing suit, your friends decide they want a group picture. You get the bartender to snap the photo while you all pose, and then he shows you the picture. Jennifer says she doesn't like it because she was squinting, so Mr. Bartender takes another. Now Cassie doesn't like it because she was hunched over funny. "Mr. Bartender!" In every photo that is taken, one person doesn't like the way she is posed, but in every single shot you are fat, and there's nothing you can do about it. And with every single shot you are reminded of it.
It is no surprise to me that I'm fat, but I hope I can at least forget about it for a while when I'm on vacation. With these darn digital cameras I see myself immediately and it detracts from my enjoyment of the moment. Maybe I shouldn't be drinking this sweet and delicious pina colada. Instead of steak and lobster tonight, I should just have some boiled carrots. Because I don't deserve to have any fun because I'm fat.
I know its not the camera's fault, but I must admit that I would have had more fun if I hadn't seen my sagging arm fat or my shapeless form. So what am I going to do about it? I don't have a brilliant answer, or an answer that will necessarily work for someone else in my situation. What I will do is start being nice to my body by not cluttering it up with crap. I will feed myself with food that nourishes my body. I will not deprive myself of an occasional treat, and I will understand that "occasional" does not mean every day or every meal. I will report my progress here, even if its bad. And when it is bad, I will not give up. I will admit that I made some bad choices, figure out a better way to handle the situation, and keep on truckin'.
Just Getting By is not about weight loss. It is about getting through life, and balancing all of its demands. One of my biggest and hardest demands to manage is my weight. I have often said that celebrities have it easy when it comes to weight loss. Not that they just magically lose the weight; they have to work just as hard as we do to get results. But in addition to losing weight, I have to get the kids to school, count change so I can buy milk, vacuum and do the laundry, and dig a trench in the backyard when it rains because the HOA doesn't think its important to maintain the drainage system. I may be wrong, but I don't think celebrities do most of those things.
So if you are a regular person, single, a mom, a single mom, a working mom or SAHM, hang in there with me. On the days I don't lose weight, its because I'm busy paying the mortgage. You know what things distract or prevent you from doing what is best for yourself. Please share your challenges with me, and I will do the same. Let's learn from and support each other. We may not ever be bikini ready, but we can try!
I'm gonna go buy some carrots.
November 11, 2011
Adios!
I'm going to Mexico today. This is a trip that my best friend planned "for the girls". My friend Jen is a take charge kind of person. She asked me a few months ago if I was ready for a Vegas trip. Living in San Diego makes Las Vegas very accessible, too accessible. I hate Vegas. I have been there and done that, and the only reason I continue to go is because its a semi-central place for my three out of state friends and I to meet up. In addition to hating Vegas, I am unemployed and just getting by financially, so when she asked me to go, I reluctantly agreed.
Imagine my surprise when she called me back a couple of days later and told me we were booked for Cabo San Lucas. She wasn't just thinking about it, or running it by me. We had plane tickets, timeshare, and rental car already reserved and paid for. How could I say no?
But since the trip was still months away, I put it on my mind's back burner. I love to procrastinate so I haven't done a thing to prepare myself, with the exception of dig out my passport to make sure I had it. Now I sit here with a list of things I need to get done in the next three hours: finish laundry, pack, put gas in the car, go to the bank, prepare meals and instructions for my husband, etc. Why, you ask, do I sit here blogging instead of getting started on my tasks? Because there is one more thing on the list, and I don't wanna do it! I need a bathing suit. I am digging my heels in like a two year old. No. NO. NOOOO!!
When I am done here, I will put the clothes in the dryer, put some stuff in my suitcase, throw some food in the crock pot, and grab the check I need to take to the bank. On the way to the bank I will stop for gas. After the bank I will have just enough time to sprint into Target, snatch the first non-attention-grabbing suit off the rack, shove some money at the cashier, and pray that not too much cottage cheese will spill out of the bottom of the suit.
When I return from Mexico, please look forward to my post on fitness and weight loss.
Imagine my surprise when she called me back a couple of days later and told me we were booked for Cabo San Lucas. She wasn't just thinking about it, or running it by me. We had plane tickets, timeshare, and rental car already reserved and paid for. How could I say no?
But since the trip was still months away, I put it on my mind's back burner. I love to procrastinate so I haven't done a thing to prepare myself, with the exception of dig out my passport to make sure I had it. Now I sit here with a list of things I need to get done in the next three hours: finish laundry, pack, put gas in the car, go to the bank, prepare meals and instructions for my husband, etc. Why, you ask, do I sit here blogging instead of getting started on my tasks? Because there is one more thing on the list, and I don't wanna do it! I need a bathing suit. I am digging my heels in like a two year old. No. NO. NOOOO!!
When I am done here, I will put the clothes in the dryer, put some stuff in my suitcase, throw some food in the crock pot, and grab the check I need to take to the bank. On the way to the bank I will stop for gas. After the bank I will have just enough time to sprint into Target, snatch the first non-attention-grabbing suit off the rack, shove some money at the cashier, and pray that not too much cottage cheese will spill out of the bottom of the suit.
When I return from Mexico, please look forward to my post on fitness and weight loss.
November 8, 2011
Mean People Suck
Why are we all so mean to each other? Two things happened to me yesterday that I just can’t stop thinking about. The two incidents were nothing big, but for some reason they ate away at me all night. By the time I woke up this morning, I realized why I was so bothered: my feelings were hurt. I have a pretty thick skin and I march to the beat of a different drummer. Most things that people say and do that could be construed as negative have little effect on me as I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion and should not be judged by me. People can think whatever they want, I’m going to go about my business as planned. So how did I get my feelings hurt?
The first incident occurred early in the morning as I was driving my husband and son to work and an appointment. It was rush hour and I was merging onto the freeway. Since there was traffic I was not able to speed up or slow down to enter the flow. My lane and the lane I was trying to enter were both traveling at about three miles per hour, so where my lane ended, the cars were taking turns merging, one car from my lane, one car from the other lane. It was my turn but the car that should have gone behind me didn’t want to let me in. Although I thought it was rude, I decided that he must be in a hurry (to go nowhere at 3mph) so I let him go ahead. If things had ended there, I would have forgotten about it in less that a minute.
But it didn’t end there. The car behind the car that wouldn’t let me in didn’t want to let me in either. As I pulled in behind the first car, this (excuse me) butthole revved his engine, got within two inches of my front fender and forced me out of the lane. The lane I came from had ended so now I was on the shoulder with no place to go. I would have let him go ahead so I could merge in behind him, but he wouldn’t pull up. So I tried to go ahead and guess what, he wouldn’t let me. He finally pulled ahead and the car behind him graciously let me in. I changed lanes again and eventually ended up next to him, not on purpose, but because that’s where the 3mph traffic put me. As I pulled next to him he thoughtfully displayed his middle finger for the entire time I was next to him.
He took the next exit, which, ironically, I had long since passed by the time he got to it. Not letting me in had not saved him any time. The only results of his actions were that my son got a lesson on how to be rude, and I got to feel bad. I had done nothing wrong to this person, other than exist and it made me feel bad that the simple fact of my existence could make someone so angry. I did my best to let it go, but it nagged at me all day.
The second incident was much less significant, but (perhaps because I was already feeling down) made me feel worse than the first. I had both my kids with me at the supermarket. I had put my two year old in one of those carts with a car and steering wheel on the front. As we were in line to check out he had gotten a little rowdy because he dropped his toy car. I had picked it up but since we were in the check-out aisle there was not enough room to squeeze around to the front of the cart to give it back to him. Also, since the cart was so long with the car part in front, I couldn’t even hand it to my older son to pass it to him. We were next in line anyway so I just held on to it.
The woman who was in line ahead of me had already paid, but she was still standing there, taking an excessive amount of time organizing her wallet and handing her bags to her daughter. The checker had already rung up my items and was standing there waiting for me to move up to pay. The line behind me was growing and my toddler was getting angry because I still had his car. I patiently waited and didn’t tell her to hurry up or sigh loudly or anything. When she turned to leave I began to push my cart to move up and accidentally bumped her with the front of it. The bump was so light that I wasn’t even sure I had touched her until she turned around and looked at me. I immediately apologized since it was my fault and I felt bad. She rolled her eyes, grunted at me, and then continued to cut her eyes back at me as she walked away. By that time I had had it with feeling bad and I told her if she didn’t have such a bad attitude, that maybe that kind of thing wouldn’t happen to her. My own reaction made me feel worse because I had stooped to her level.
I didn’t expect her to become my best friend and say it didn’t hurt, and that it was her fault for taking so long in line. I didn’t expect that because it was my fault for trying to hurry so my son would settle down. But I really didn’t expect rudeness. A simple, “that’s ok” would have sufficed. Now I am unsure of what I should do if I unintentionally offend someone. I tried an apology, but that was obviously not the correct thing to do.
I know that we are all a little on edge in the world today. We have some serious problems politically, environmentally, financially. But non of those things will ever be resolved if we have no respect or common courtesy for each other. People being mean and rude to me caused me to feel bad and to eventually be rude myself. People naturally pass along what they are given. Wouldn’t it be just as easy to give good will? Being nice is free.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)