Lose Weight, Get Out Of Debt, And Have A Clean House!

That title completely sums up my secret desires. Just three things. Why are three simple things so hard? Judging from the volume of self help materials on these three subjects, I'm not the only one who struggles with these. I have done a fair share of reading on each topic, and have found that there are as many approaches to solving these problems as there are people who write about them. Who is right?

When you go to the bookstore to get a book on getting out of debt, do you buy the most expensive one, because it must be good? If you're in debt, you should probably buy the cheapest one, but is the advice in there as valuable? In the weight loss aisle, do you get the book with the curvy woman on the front, or the stick thin chick? Looks like the curvy woman isn't as successful at losing weight, but the stick thin one may never have been fat to begin with.

Here is the secret I have discovered. Two words will solve any problem you have. Two words will simplify your quest for well being. Suspense and drum roll please. Here they come: DO IT.

What is 'IT', you ask? 'IT' is what ever you will actually DO. Pick any diet book. If it says to eat only cabbage and yogurt and nothing else, guess what? You will lose weight. The problems come when on the third day you realize you hate cabbage, and you're lactose intolerant. You give up and go back to your old ways. So when you pick a diet plan, make sure you can realistically see yourself doing what is required. If the plan requires that you make hot home cooked meals three times a day, but you work full time outside the home, you will fail. If you are a homemaker and you love to cook, this might work for you. Look for a plan that asks you to do things that you can reasonably see yourself doing.

This is not to say you should find a plan that makes you sit in front of the television and eat Twinkies all day. You need to put in more effort than that. But if there is something in the plan that you absolutely can not do, don't bother. Here is a legitimate example: "I can not afford to pay $3000 a month to have my meals prepared by a live in chef." Here is a lame excuse: "I could not possibly put aside a serving of the meal I just prepared to eat for lunch tomorrow. I must rush out of the office and grab a burger and greasy chili cheese fries, and shovel them into my mouth while I speed back to the office so I'm not late."

Find something that fits your lifestyle, whether you're wealthy or struggling, busy or not, and then DO IT. This will work for weight loss, getting out of debt, or getting your house organized. The biggest obstacle is usually yourself. It really doesn't matter what plan you choose. If you don't do it, it wont work.

If you have trouble with the same three things I do, here is another secret. Work on one at a time. You don't have to complete one before you start another, but if you get good at practicing one, the others seem to get easier, or just happen naturally. Sometimes you only have a problem with one thing, but it causes the others to happen.

For instance, if you have a lot of debt because you can't or wont control your finances, you might work long hard hours just to be able to stay afloat. Because you work so much, you don't feel like doing housework. Since you never do the dishes, you can't find your stove so now you have to go to Greasy's for dinner. Of course you pay for dinner with the credit card, and so you order twice as much as you need because you can 'afford' it. Next month when the credit card bill comes, you really intended to pay it on time, but it got lost in the pile of mail on the dining room table that you never eat at because its always covered in credit card bills with charges from Greasy's because you always have to eat out because you can't use the dining room table.

In this case, choose one thing to attack. Suck it up and clean off the dining room table. Now you don't get a late charge because you know where the credit card bill is, and you lose weight because you ate something at home instead of fattening fast food. I know this is over simplified, but it doesn't need to be over complicated either. Work on one thing, and as you find small successes, you will have more energy and be more motivated to work on the next thing.

Next week I will share some specifics on how I get these things done. They may work for you (if you are 34 years old, married, have an 11 year old, a two year old, one on the way, a cat, live in Southern California, and have brown hair, like me), or they might not fit your lifestyle. Either way, don't lose sight of the secret. My specific plans only work for me when I actually do them.

Buenos Dias?

    Well, I chickened out. In my last post I told you I was going to buy a new bathing suit for my trip to Mexico. I just got so busy procrastinating that I didn't have the time. And I had packed my old suit just in case. As it turns out, a new suit would not have helped me anyway.
     Mexico was beautiful and relaxing. We stayed in a pretty posh resort with a FANTASTIC pool. On the first day we went for a dip in the morning, and somehow didn't manage to get out of the pool until it got dark. The swim up bar probably contributed to our lengthy stay. So with perfect weather, a beautiful pool, and attentive resort staff, what could I complain about?
     Digital cameras, that's what (please stay with me while I rationalize). In the old days, you took your camera on vacation, and took pictures of beautiful and interesting things, or yourself next to those things. You hoped that the pictures came out. You enjoyed your trip, and then when you got home you sent the film in to be developed. Then you got to relive the excitement of your vacation when the pictures came back. Sometimes there would be a picture that was bad because the flash didn't go off, or you had your eyes closed and your mouth gaping open, but that was okay. You treasured the memory of your vacation.
     Then along comes the digital camera. Now, as you're relaxing at the swim up bar in your five-year-old-pre-last-baby-who-is-now-two-so-there's-no-excuse-for-not-losing-the-baby-weight-yet bathing suit, your friends decide they want a group picture. You get the bartender to snap the photo while you all pose, and then he shows you the picture. Jennifer says she doesn't like it because she was squinting, so Mr. Bartender takes another. Now Cassie doesn't like it because she was hunched over funny. "Mr. Bartender!" In every photo that is taken, one person doesn't like the way she is posed, but in every single shot you are fat, and there's nothing you can do about it. And with every single shot you are reminded of it.
     It is no surprise to me that I'm fat, but I hope I can at least forget about it for a while when I'm on vacation. With these darn digital cameras I see myself immediately and it detracts from my enjoyment of the moment. Maybe I shouldn't be drinking this sweet and delicious pina colada. Instead of steak and lobster tonight, I should just have some boiled carrots. Because I don't deserve to have any fun because I'm fat.
     I know its not the camera's fault, but I must admit that I would have had more fun if I hadn't seen my sagging arm fat or my shapeless form. So what am I going to do about it? I don't have a brilliant answer, or an answer that will necessarily work for someone else in my situation. What I will do is start being nice to my body by not cluttering it up with crap. I will feed myself with food that nourishes my body. I will not deprive myself of an occasional treat, and I will understand that "occasional" does not mean every day or every meal. I will report my progress here, even if its bad. And when it is bad, I will not give up. I will admit that I made some bad choices, figure out a better way to handle the situation, and keep on truckin'.
     Just Getting By is not about weight loss. It is about getting through life, and balancing all of its demands. One of my biggest and hardest demands to manage is my weight. I have often said that celebrities have it easy when it comes to weight loss. Not that they just magically lose the weight; they have to work just as hard as we do to get results. But in addition to losing weight, I have to get the kids to school, count change so I can buy milk, vacuum and do the laundry, and dig a trench in the backyard when it rains because the HOA doesn't think its important to maintain the drainage system. I may be wrong, but I don't think celebrities do most of those things.
     So if you are a regular person, single, a mom, a single mom, a working mom or SAHM, hang in there with me. On the days I don't lose weight, its because I'm busy paying the mortgage. You know what things distract or prevent you from doing what is best for yourself. Please share your challenges with me, and I will do the same. Let's learn from and support each other. We may not ever be bikini ready, but we can try!
     I'm gonna go buy some carrots.

Adios!

     I'm going to Mexico today.  This is a trip that my best friend planned "for the girls". My friend Jen is a take charge kind of person. She asked me a few months ago if I was ready for a Vegas trip. Living in San Diego makes Las Vegas very accessible, too accessible. I hate Vegas. I have been there and done that, and the only reason I continue to go is because its a semi-central place for my three out of state friends and I to meet up. In addition to hating Vegas, I am unemployed and just getting by financially, so when she asked me to go, I reluctantly agreed.
    Imagine my surprise when she called me back a couple of days later and told me we were booked for Cabo San Lucas. She wasn't just thinking about it, or running it by me. We had plane tickets, timeshare, and rental car already reserved and paid for. How could I say no?
     But since the trip was still months away, I put it on my mind's back burner. I love to procrastinate so I haven't done a thing to prepare myself, with the exception of dig out my passport to make sure I had it. Now I sit here with a list of things I need to get done in the next three hours: finish laundry, pack, put gas in the car, go to the bank, prepare meals and instructions for my husband, etc. Why, you ask, do I sit here blogging instead of getting started on my tasks? Because there is one more thing on the list, and I don't wanna do it! I need a bathing suit. I am digging my heels in like a two year old. No. NO. NOOOO!!
     When I am done here, I will put the clothes in the dryer, put some stuff in my suitcase, throw some food in the crock pot, and grab the check I need to take to the bank. On the way to the bank I will stop for gas. After the bank I will have just enough time to sprint into Target, snatch the first non-attention-grabbing suit off the rack, shove some money at the cashier, and pray that not too much cottage cheese will spill out of the bottom of the suit.
     When I return from Mexico, please look forward to my post on fitness and weight loss.